I was so sure that today was Tuesday. I even felt relieved that I had one more day before my Wednesday Weigh-In, hahaha. I knew I was not going to do well this week (well, it’s actually been TWO weeks since my last weigh-in). Things have been so out of routine and the last couple of weeks was a challenge.

Jerry had to do a special project at work which temporarily switched his schedule again (naturally, it was right when we were getting used to the new schedule). Everything they had him doing was so *not* what he’d signed up for when he took the new position in December. It’s back to normal now (including his schedule) but it gave him enough insight to reconsider the position.

He has an interview in a different department today. It would be a big leap for him, but he said he’d really like to learn new things. It would also give him experience that he can use outside of his plant–if something should happen and he needs to find work elsewhere, it will give him the skills that he can use in all sorts of settings. He said he’ll be happy if he gets the position, but he won’t be devastated if he doesn’t.

The biggest change would be that he’d go back to working a screwy schedule–except it would be day shift rather than the night shift he’d been working for three years. After all he did to get the new schedule he has now, he said he kind of misses the longer days! He’d prefer to work three or four 12-hour shifts a week than five 8-hour shifts (which makes sense–it’s nice to have three or four days off a week!). He also misses having random days off during the week, rather than just the weekends.

Anyway, I only write about this because while Jerry was working longer days the last couple of weeks, it affected our eating habits. Eating dinner later, staying up later, eating snacks after dinner… the habits I’d worked hard to get rid of! I wasn’t surprised then, to see my weight was up today.

I think I was at around 143 last time and today I was at 146. I’m not happy about it, but I can’t pretend I didn’t know that would happen when I fell back into some old habits. No excuses here–just accountability.

My friend Emily texted me a few days ago to ask if I might be interested in running the Detroit Marathon with her this fall. After I laughed out loud and declined (which she totally expected), I started to think that maybe I’d like to start running again. (I don’t mean the runs around the block, which are more for mental health than physical fitness.) I certainly have no interest in distance running again, but it would be nice to feel back in shape enough to run 3-5 miles a couple of times a week.

The very next day, I came across a movie on Netflix called Tyson’s Run. I am sure I won’t do a good job explaining it, so here is the trailer (below). While I normally prefer thrillers and horror movies, once in a while I love a “feel good” story–and this one is GREAT. I don’t know if it’s the movies or if it’s me that is getting more emotional with time, hahaha.

Watching that movie was inspiring to me, and again, I thought about wanting to run. Jerry asked me if I miss running and the answer is that I miss running *when I was in shape to run*. Running when I’m out of shape is not at all fun; and unfortunately for me, the only way to get into running shape is to run! Over the last several years, I just haven’t wanted to put up with the discomfort of training. However, I really miss the feel of coming inside after a good run and feeling great all day.

On the occasions I do go for a run, I can feel my leg muscles aching and my lungs begging for more oxygen, and it’s so hard to think ahead to the point of how good I’ll feel when I’m back in shape. Having patience with diet and exercise is so hard, isn’t it?! If I truly want to find joy in running again, I have to put in the work to get back into shape. And that takes time and patience. I already know what I need to do if I want to get back there–I just have to go into it with the right attitude.

I’m going to give it some more thought this week. In the meantime, however, I am going to state my goal for this week as this: I am going to do a “test run” this week to see just how bad off I am! Hahaha. I’m pretty sure I can run three miles, but I am 100% sure it won’t feel easy. I don’t care at all about my pace, but I’m very curious to see how I feel. And then I can decide if I’m willing to make the commitment at this time in my life 😉